You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Randomize
