If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
my being single is dangerous.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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