Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
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