3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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