Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
All I want is dick and wine.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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