You're so nebulous sometimes
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
