its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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