you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize
