I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
