Grow some girl-balls and come out already
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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