Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
