He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad