i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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