Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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