If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.