And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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