I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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