He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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