return my video game
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Randomize