Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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