I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
