wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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