playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
