Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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