The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
