arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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