what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
