he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.