I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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