dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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