Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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