I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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