and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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