grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize