Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!