Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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