She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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