Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
