He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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