you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
