Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Found your dick twin last night
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Randomize