dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
