My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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