so that wasnt chicken after all
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
