don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
