Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
