I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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