This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize