Redeem this text for a blowjob
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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