My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
